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Have you ever asked your mother how her birthday was celebrated? Did she ever celebrate her birthdays? Do you remember how your elders celebrated birthdays two or three decades ago? Is it the same way we celebrate today?
Birthdays have long been a reason for joy and celebration, moments with loved ones, and creating memories. Celebration has evolved, particularly when comparing urban and suburban areas and eras. Culture and lifestyle play a significant role in shaping how birthdays are observed. However, changes are seen in the celebration, from arrangements to decorations and gifts.
In the past, birthday celebrations were often simple and intimate affairs. People would gather with family, friends and neighbours.
In urban areas, celebrations were mainly held in community centres or clubs, while suburban residents tended to celebrate at home. Despite differences in resources—mainly due to economic factors—both arrangements aimed to create a memorable day.
Jannatul Nayem Nayma, 18, a resident of Nazirhat, a suburban area in Chattogram, reflects on how birthday celebrations have changed for her over time. "When I was younger, birthdays were all about having many people, presents and colourful decorations. Now I prefer meaningful gifts from special people and a quieter celebration just with my family," she said.
Jannatul fondly remembers the birthday traditions of her childhood. "Mother used to bake the cake; we decorated it with mini chocolate tubes called 'choco choco.' 'The whole house, including friends and neighbours, was busy decorating the house with handmade things. Now, we cook a couple of dishes that everyone in the family enjoys. As we all became busy, we tried to make the best of it."
Nowadays, birthdays in urban areas have been greatly influenced by social media. Platforms like Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok have set new expectations.
The pressure to share the "perfect celebration" has led to extravagant parties, visits to fancy restaurants, and more lavish public displays.
However, keeping their celebrations simple and intimate for many makes them feel blessed and happy.
Besides cake and decor, urban birthday parties in the past were less likely to have large-scale events. Birthday celebration activities were held before the guests, such as pillow passing, guessing song names, Antrakshi, or some indoor game. Someone will bring a camera and take photographs. Later, they would print out the photo our mothers showed the guests, saying, "See, it's him/her on his/her first birthday."
Urban families now opt for themed parties and presents— such as princess, superhero, or pop-culture themes. The decoration has become a form of art that reflects the interest or philosophy of the birthday person. The focus on visual appeal is deeply embedded.
In suburban areas, there is a tendency for people to have home-behaving celebrations. They would do handmade decorations together. Hand-drawn birthday banners were a common sight.
The homely touch made the event more engaging and memorable.
Global trends have changed some of the traditions of celebration in the suburbs. The families now organize a ready-made party in a simple yet stylish way. They still gather close relatives, friends, and neighbours with a strong emphasis on spending a beautiful time together.
Clicking good photographs and posting on social media has also become mainstream. Some will even be seen making reels and tiktoks.
Cake-cutting is among the most common rituals in urban and suburban birthday celebrations. The same excitement is carried while receiving thoughtful presents based on the birthday person's interests.
Sweets are a significant part of the celebration in the Bengali birthday tradition. Some everyday treats are served at urban and suburban birthday parties — such as roshogolla, Sandesh, and mishti doi, symbolizing warmth and hospitality.
But this has also changed over time. In the '90s and early 2000s, people gave books as presents wrapped in colourful papers. Also, toys for the younger ones, watches, flowers, and dresses for the adults were given on the birthdays.
On the other hand, we see varieties of gifts such as jewellery, clothes, favourite gadgets, customized products, and photo albums given in recent days. Mostly, the occasion is celebrated at restaurants.
Religious or spiritual practices like seeking blessings from elders or visiting a mosque or temple are often included as one of the most crucial celebration parts in urban and suburban settings. Even arranging milaad was a go-to thing in those days.
The true joy of a birthday lies in the intimate moments spent with loved ones. The power of shared celebration reminds us of the importance of human connection. The memories that stay with us long after the celebration ends hold on to long after the final song is sung. The sense of unity and collective memory makes the day more memorable.