9 months ago

Remembering Sabihuddin Ahmed, former secretary and high commissioner

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Death is a part of life that leaves people with a lifetime of memories. No matter how much time goes by, it cannot lessen the grief of losing a loved one. I am writing this tribute to express my immense love, and to honor my dearest husband - these words carry the weight of his loss. 
My husband’s death is the most heart-wrenching and tragic moment of my life. The profound sorrow, shock and grief of that moment is still fresh even after a year. It was a nightmare for me, and not a single day passed by without thinking of him and missing his presence. Life in itself has become difficult without him. I can still feel his breath, his presence, his compassionate look and loving smile. On the last day at the hospital, he called me close to him before they took him to the ICU and held my hands. He said to me, “If anything happens to me, please keep me in a frozen van for Ashna” (our eldest daughter). I will never forget that moment and the calmness with which he said it. 
We lived a full, happy life, and I treasure the countless memories with my late husband, which I think about every day in the hopes of some solace and mental peace. He was full of life and energy- always the life at friends’ gatherings, cracking jokes, and playing pranks. His smile was infectious and full of joy. He was always positive, caring and compassionate to everyone - adults and kids alike. Everyone who knew him loved and adored him.
Life is sometimes very unfair and cruel. We know that nothing is in our hands, Allah decides our life and death. Our family is still struggling to cope with this pain and emptiness, but we will always carry his life and memories in our hearts. His death has created a void in my life, which can never be filled. He held our family together with his everlasting love, care and kindness. We have learnt so many things from him. He was humble and down to earth. He taught our kids the value of honesty and hard work. He loved spending time with his family and kids - playing board games with them till late at night, taking them out to eat, or on family holidays - he ensured that he spent sufficient time with them.
His courage was exemplary. There were many difficulties in our life but he never gave up and always faced the challenges with a smile and positivity. Over the years, he had immense faith in Allah and never gave up hope in the midst of adversity. He survived a stroke, fought back overcoming countless challenges, to recover and live life as normally as possible.
He was truly a perfect gentleman, kind and caring to everyone, helping countless people with their problems and challenges. He loved me unconditionally and valued me at every step in our journey. He patiently guided me through all the various hurdles and taught me the importance of perseverance.
I was truly blessed to have a person like him as my husband. Sometimes I wish I could have done more to protect him and make things better for him. His knowledge, his life experiences and achievements fill me with profound joy and I feel proud that I was his life partner.
We all pray for him every day, every moment of our lives. He will live forever in our hearts, in the love he has given to his family and friends, in the spirit and resilience of his children and grandchildren. May Allah keep him in the highest place in Jannah!
Mrs Rownak Ahmed is the wife of late Sabihuddin Ahmed, former Secretary and High Commissioner.

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